In my recent interview for the Risk Without Regret radio show, I discussed mistakes and how they had shaped my life. I want to add some additional context to making mistakes and where failure is necessary in our personal development.
To leave the road of continual failure, a person must first utter the three most difficult words to say; “I was wrong.”
I WAS WRONG!
You have to open your eyes, admit mistakes, and accept complete responsibility for the current wrong actions and attitudes.
Every failure you experience is a fork in the road. It’s and opportunity to take the right action, learn form your mistakes and begin again. Yet the key here is being able to identify that a mistake is simply that decision and experience. It does not have to define you!
“The better a man is, the more mistakes he will make, for the more new things he will try. I would never promote a top level person who was not making mistakes….otherwise they are sure to be mediocre.” – Leadership expert Peter Drucker
There is a reason I share this outside of self promotion. It’s for only one reason really – to show others that we all have to overcome adversity and we are all human. The choice of success and failure is ours and no one else.
You see for over a decade I was ashamed of my younger years and tried to hide them in hopes no one would bring it up.
But guess what? Those stories of my past made me who I am today.
And I am okay with who I am. Shit – I like who I am and where my life is.
But I had to own my past as part of the story and not be ashamed of it.
I grew up in a divorced home.
I slept on a mattress on the floor.
I was a juvenile delinquent who was in and out of the system.
I was a single dad.
I have been fired from jobs I liked
I lost both my parents, lost my source of income, had a major surgery and had a son born in the ICU all within 6 months of each other.
On the flip side of that I have built over 20 projects, business, raised 10 million in capital, helped hundreds of people overcome adversity, I am an author, renegade, lover and happy with who I am.
This is my story. Unfiltered. Unadulterated and OWED.
Today’s lesson – Own your story. Don’t be ashamed of who you are.
Hang in there – this is not a political post as much as it is a mindset toward peace. Not global peace – yet the parallel to inner peace, struggle and self worth.
Chapter 27 – Are We Up to the Task – Washington D.C. January 1, 1960
Certainly it is time for change – time for us, in the words of Walter Lippman, “to come alive and to be alert and to show vigor, and not to keep mouthing the same old slogans, and not to dawdle along in the same old ruts.”
But the primary point is that, whether we like it or not, this is a time of change. As a people that set out to change the world, I think we should like it, however difficult the challenges. For no nation is at its best except under great challenge.
The question for us now is whether in a changing world we will respond in a way befitting “the land of the free and the home of the brave” – whether we will be at our best in these crucial years our world leadership – whether we will measure to the task awaiting us.
Let’s unpack this for a moment. Take out the politics and think about how these words can be applied to us personally. When under extreme adversity will you crumble or will you stand up to the task to build a better foundation for yourself? I am under some personal trials that have questioned the very fabric that I am built from. In these times – I have to look in the mirror and reflect…. Come alive and to be alert and to show vigor.
“Who exactly do you want to be? What kind of person do you want to be? What are your personal ideals? Whom do you admire? What are their special traits that you would make your own?”
“It’s time to stop being vague. If you wish to be an extraordinary person, if you wish to be wise, then you should explicitly identify the kind of person you aspire to become. If you have a daybook, write down who are trying to be, so that you can refer to this self- definition. Precisely describe the demeanor you want to adopt so that you may preserve it when you are by yourself or with other people.” – The Art of Living by Epictetus
Over the past 40 years I have gone through many personal changes. Who I wanted to be and who I became have been through an evolution. You know the cool thing – You can be and do what ever you want at any age. I know it sounds like a card you would get a high school graduation, but it is true.
Start with a simple list. Grab a pen and piece of paper. Write down 10 traits that you like most about the people in your life.
Why do you like these attributes?
What makes them so special?
Highlight or circle the words that you would like to add to your character when people ask about you.
“Know first who you are and what you’re capable of.” – Epictetus
Just as nothing great is created instantly, the same goes for the perfecting of our talents and aptitudes. We are always learning, always growing. It is right to accept challenges. This is how we progress to the next level of intellectual, physical, or moral development. Still, don’t kid yourself: If you try to be something or someone you are not, you belittle your true self and end up not developing in those areas that you would have excelled at quite naturally.
Within the divine order, we each have our own special calling. Listen to yours and follow it faithfully.
With the road to 2016 now only 2 days away, I couldn’t help but personally reflect on the above passage. The areas I have found the most personal growth is when I started caring less of what others would think, and focused on myself and others in my life that really mater.
We all have our own personal calling. Are you listening? Make today great.
“Show me a man who cannot be bothered to do the little things and I will show you a man that cannot be trusted to do the big things.” Lawerence Dale
There have been many new and exciting things going on behind the scenes here at The Healthy Primate. It has caused me to pull the breaks back a bit to assure I can deliver on the core mission of why I started sharing this journey. A quick insight into some things that we are working on.
Book Release – Stress Management
Video Series to support the book
Partnership with one of the leading fitness groups in the United States
Possible brick and mortar location for a training facility
Family, holidays, and daily life
I have 2 podcasts that are in edit from the past, these will be posted shortly. As the quote above states – are you willing and able to do the small things in your business that will lead to the biggest impact?
The ground is shaking as rubble starts to pelt the helmets of two soldiers. “Leonidas, it’s an earth quake.” The camera pans over to a shredded Gerard Butler in battle gear. His reply – “No they are getting in battle formation!” As both armies prepare for the opening scene in the movie 300 you can tell this is going to be intense. Gerard looks to his men in line, and shouts one last word of encouragement prior to the battle that is moments away.
“Remember this day men, for it will be yours for all time!”
When you look back in cinematic history, I am not sure of one film that had so many toned actors have been on one set. That is in part and thanks to the head trainer Mark Twight. A section of the press kit that was sent from Warner Brothers read the following.
“To support fight preparation the training emphasized athleticism by combining compound movements, lifting, and throwing. Primitive tools – medicine balls, Kettlebells, rings – were used instead of machines. Each session was competitive, with a penalty-reward system tied to performance and results posted daily for all to see.”
Mark has a great article HERE that demystifies the program he used for the men on the set of 300. You will be hard pressed to find any secret sauce out side of “hardwork”.
The Original 300 Workout:
25x Pull-up +
50x Deadlift @ 135# +
50x Push-up +
50x Box Jump @ 24″ box +
50x Floor Wiper @ 135# (one-count) +
50x KB Clean and Press @ 36# (KB must touch floor between reps) +
25x Pull-up = 300 reps total
If that isn’t enough to get you moving, the team over at Onnit put together a few variations of the epic 300 workouts that look pretty intense. Funk Roberts has a great video series of 10 variations of the classic 300 work out.
As I am getting back after surgery, I look forward to reporting back on results from these programs.
When I started this journey now almost two years ago, a glaring health risk presented itself. It was one thing to loose weight and get myself physically in a better place, it was quite the other trying to understand why I was still so anxious. After meeting with a few friends who are experts in the space of stress management, it was clear to me what the next stage of my life was to become.
Immersing myself into understanding the science behind stress consumed me. Now let me be clear about a few things.
I am by no means a Yogi now
I still get stressed and freak out
My wife thinks I am insane
But what I am – is educated on understanding why my body and mind does what it does and how I can control aspects of it without medication or having a damn heart attack.
If you have followed The Healthy Primate and the journey of the site, you will see three distinct commonalities. I focus on Mind, Body & Soul. This has been done on purpose as you see that was the order I focused on and cataloged in my personal journey to becoming a better person.
Mind: Understand the ways to reduce stress, increase cognitive thought and being fully aware of your potential.
Body: If you are overweight and missing physical activity, your mind and systems will respond accordingly. From food, exercise to thoughts and process to make your physical self the best it can be. This will allow the Mind to reach heights un measured before.
Soul: The center of it all is finding that balance, happiness and reaching your full potential. When the mind is right, you can focus on the body. When the mind & body are right – your inner balance comes into play.
Bonus: When we are in balance we will have thoughts to reach the things we truly want to do in life. Start that business you been pondering, quit the shit job you have been shlepping to for years, build a healthier relationship with those in your life from friends to family.
The mind is such a complicated technology that we often take for granted. At the core of it all has been my studies on Cortisol as a stressor. The following video is a great explanation of what is happening in your mind when fall under stress for small and long periods of time.
The presentation mentions exercise & meditation as the route to reduce and control cortisol.
Check out the review we did on the app Headspace for meditation and how 10 minutes a day changes things.
As I journaled 16 months of blood work centered on Cortisol management I recommend a few additional tools that will help tremendously. I cover this in detail in my up coming book that will be released in January 2016.
Why Your Life is Killing You – My Journey to Reducing Stress and Living to Tell About It.
Here are the top three natural supplements that you can take that will reduce your cortisol dramatically. You can get these at your local natural healthy food shop IE Sprouts or online.
Ashwagandha: Ashwagandha, an exotic Indian herb, has remarkable stress-relieving properties comparable to those of powerful drugs used to treat depression and anxiety. In addition to its excellent protective effects on the nervous system, ashwagandha may be a promising alternative treatment for a variety of degenerative diseases such as Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s. Ashwagandha has powerful antioxidant properties that seek and destroy the free radicals that have been implicated in aging and numerous disease states. Even more remarkable, emerging evidence suggests that ashwagandha has anti-cancer benefits as well. (Source)
Rhodiola-rosea: Rhodiola significantly reduces the effects of prolonged and minor physical exhaustion that results in fatigue. This is more related to stress and the ‘burnout’ effect, or prolonged but low intensity physical exercise. (Source)
Kava Kava: Kava has a calming effect, producing brain wave changes similar to changes that occur with calming medicines such as diazepam (Valium, for example). Kava also can prevent convulsions and relax muscles. Although kava is not addictive, its effect may decrease with use. Traditionally prepared as a tea, kava root is also available as a dietary supplement in powder and tincture (extract in alcohol) forms. ( Source )
*As always consult with your Dr. when taking supplements.
In combination of education, understanding and taking action you really can change the outputs and way your mind and body deal and process stress. Thank you as always for reading!
“There is no better time in history to start a business.”
This week we feature our interview with Mr. Nathan Chan. CEO, Editor and Founder of Foundr Magazine. Foundr Magazine is a top resource for entrepreneurs globally. They have featured names such as Sir Richard Branson, Seth Godin, Arianna Huffington & Tim Ferriss, to name a few.
In our discussion we cover:
Breaking the Mold
The Importance of Learning to Do More
Building a Community – The 1 Million People Goal
Founding Foundr – The Outline and Toolset for Entrepreneurs
Branding as a Difference Maker
From Idea to Revenue
How Nathan has got to Sir Richard Branson, Seth Godin, Arianna Huffington & Tim Ferriss
This week we feature our interview with Chelsea Fine. Best selling author, speaker, entrepreneur, wife & mother. We discuss her journey from corporate america to author. From penning an idea, moving past creative block to understanding the business aspects to getting her books in front of readers around the globe.
We conduct our interview in a local library amongst the books, manuscripts and magazines
In our discussion we cover:
– The First 60 Minute Routine
– The creative process: forced vs the creative process
– The journey from Corporate America to Passion
– Putting energy into a passion to build a business she loved & Walking Away
– Writing and the land of forgotten manuscripts – The Barnes and Noble effect
– Sophie and Carter: Driving Urgency,This Moment Matters
– To Publish or not to Publish – The Business
– Traditional Publishing vs Self Publishing – How do you choose the correct route to get to your readers?
– How do you separate your work in a crowded market place?
– 1 Million Books
– Thing things to know if you want to be an author